An average man has just one, outside chance: Both use to a similar degree the part of the brain responsible for semantic knowledge and juxtaposition and the part involved in language processing. All right try it the other way (as the bishop said to the barmaid). When Roseanne stands up and tells biker jokes and invites people who don t dig her shtick to suck her dick know what I am saying? A flat, crude, unanswerable disproof of any nonsense about intelligent design. Those who risk agony and death to bring children into this fiasco simply can t afford to be too frivolous. (And there just aren t that many episiotomy jokes, even in the male repertoire. ) I am certain that this is also partly why, in all cultures, it is females who are the rank-and-file mainstay of religion, which in turn is the official enemy of all humor. He had better be able to make the lady laugh. In all the millions of cartoons that feature a patient listening glum-faced to a physician ( There s no cure.
As Kipling continues: The plain fact is that the physical structure of the human being is a joke in itself: There isn t even a race for a cure ), do you remember even one where the patient is a woman? Even the mothers of other fledglings have to drive their fingernails into their palms and wiggle their toes, just to prevent themselves from fainting dead away at the sheer tedium of it. I shall not elaborate further. Indeed, we now have all the joy of a scientific study, which illuminates the difference. But without tragedy there could be no comedy. The word issue My beloved said to me, when I told her I was going to have to address this melancholy topic, that I should cheer up because women get funnier as they get older. Dorothy Parker, Nora Ephron, Fran Lebowitz, Ellen DeGeneres. (Though ask yourself, was Dorothy Parker ever really funny? ) Greatly daring or so I thought I resolved to call up Ms. Is the key word. In other words, for women the question of funniness is essentially a secondary one. Filth. Wodehouse: the drawing back and slight lifting of the corners of the mouth, which partially uncover the teeth; The ancient annual festivities of Saturnalia, where the slaves would play master, were a temporary release from bossdom. Christopher Hitchens is a Vanity Fair contributing editor. Try being funny about that, if you like. This is funny only in male company. And if they did not operate on the humor wavelength, there would be scant point in half killing oneself in the attempt to make them writhe and scream (uproariously). And when the bundle is finally delivered, the funny side is not always immediately back in view. One tiny snuffle that turns into a wheeze, one little cut that goes septic, one pathetically small coffin, and the woman s universe is left in ashes and ruin.
Is it any wonder that they are backward in generating it? This is not to say that women are humorless, or cannot make great wits and comedians. This has all the charm and address of the learned Professor Scully s attempt to define a smile, as cited by Richard Usborne in his treatise on P. Why is it the case?, I mean. Filth in lavish, heaping quantities. Kipling saw through this: And it was all so peaceful. Men are overawed, not to say terrified, by the ability of women to produce babies. (Asked by a lady intellectual to summarize the differences between the sexes, another bishop responded, Madam, I cannot conceive. ) It gives women an unchallengeable authority. The reproductive and eliminating functions (the closeness of which is the origin of all obscenity) were obviously wired together in hell by some subcommittee that was giggling cruelly as it went about its work. ( Think they d wear this? She who faces Death by torture for each life beneath her breast May not deal in doubt or pity must not swerve for fact or jest. Allan Reiss. So when they got to the joke s punch line, they were more pleased about it. Well, they re gonna have to. ) The resulting confusion is the source of perhaps 50 percent of all humor. For a woman to say a man is funny is the equivalent of a man saying that a woman is pretty. And there s another principle that helps exclude the fair sex. Men obviously like gross stuff, Ephron did not disagree. Men have to pretend, to themselves as well as to women, that they are not the servants and supplicants. Humor is part of the armor-plate with which to resist what is already farcical enough. (Perhaps not by coincidence, battered as they are by motherfucking nature, men tend to refer to life itself as a bitch. ) Whereas women, bless their tender hearts, would prefer that life be fair, and even sweet, rather than the sordid mess it actually is. I suppose that the reasoning went: Apart from giving them a very different attitude to filth and embarrassment, it also imbues them with the kind of seriousness and solemnity at which men can only goggle. Child observation essay.